Observe and Report...a drama?

I have just returned from a 9:40 showing of "Observe and Report". You know the mall cop movie with Seth Rogen and Anna Farris. I am speechless. Speechless or in a coma. Who would think that this film would seduce me into insanity? "Observe and Report" is a mind fuck. I will begin there. From start to finish I was contemplating what made Farris and Rogen take the movie. Not only was it disturbing...creepy flashers with chode like private parts but there was gratuitous sex and violence...that was so oddly executed throughout the movie that it made even me and my friend Ruth cringe. And I've seen some pretty weird things in my time. And I am not sure if you guys are aware...but the new punch line...alcoholic mothers who don't give a flying fuck about their sons. Yup. Hiiilllarrriooouusss! At one moment in the film (roughly an hour and ten minutes in) I felt like I was drowning in bad comedy...so I got up and danced below the screen...I'm not kidding. I danced. (No one was in the theatre). Thank GOD...it would have been so hard to keep the running commentary in.

Throughout the film I couldn't help but verbally assault the screen back. I felt attacked. Rogen is known for his great smile and warm yet edgy characters...he was just a straight up dick in this flick. Farris is always type cast as the ditsy yet sexy blond...and she killed it...maybe over killed it. Many famous faces drifted through the film...but only one individual actually made the movie okay. An unknown actress who played the part of a cinnamon roll/coffee counter girl. She made it okay for me to sit throughout the movie. Who knew I would ever curse Rogen out?! I love that man. I love the Apatow clan in all of its glory. But no...Rogen...you must have been high when you took this film. I am ashamed to have watched 2 hours of nonsense. Luckily it was free. I could have seen "Obsessed". At least "Obsessed" knew what it was...a movie about Beyonce kicking ass and taking names...and getting her baby back. "Observe and Report" was no comedy...it wasn't even a drama...but it was more dramatic than comedic. Alcoholic mothers who "soil themselves", mall cops who trip on ecstasy and heroine and steal merchandise, vomiting make-up girls thrusting in painfully awkward sex...it goes on and on.

I have learned many things from you "Observe and Report". Hollywood needs better writers and stay away from mall cops. Because they will shoot you...just like in "Fight Club". All I can say is thank GOD I know what kind of actor I want to be...and thank God I actually have an understanding of what a decent script is! At least I begin work tomorrow to take my mind off of this catastrophe.

Common Courtesy.

This is for all of those people who call themselves "managers" or "owners"...anyone who hires employees at a work place. This is for everyone. As those who read my blog know...I have been on the job hunt for the entire semester. In fact, I probably would not have left school yet if I had known finding a job in Northern Colorado would be so hard. I left school so I could make money. Get a full time job...work my ass off so I could help pay for tuition costs if I decided to return to school in the fall...and to fund my future move to Los Angeles. Instead, thanks to the dying economy and my small surroundings, I fell on my ass. And when I finally thought I had struck gold at Hollister, I was quickly made aware of how I could not work there any longer (long story). This being said, I have had the worst luck finding jobs in Fort Collins, Colorado. Tips for anyone who is thinking about moving here: secure your job first. Seriously...you have to know people to get jobs here. So needless to say the process has been one big bitch. And you know what is not helping...at all...communication. People, people, people. I don't care if you work at Dairy Queen or some high class restaurant. When people leave messages you should return them. If someone says, "We will call you the next day" then you should actually call them the next day...instead of never call. And the thing is...this is common courtesy. Yet practically everywhere I have applied to (the city of Fort Collins...) does not respond or reply to applicants. I find this rude. Not only does it take time and effort to fill out an application but its not like an applicant isn't waiting to hear back from you. They are obviously applying to find a job because they are in dire need of one. So it would only be courteous to the applicant to call them within a decent amount of time. I applied and checked in with every place I applied to (more than 60 locations over a four month period) and I maybe heard back from 1 or 2. I'm not kidding.

I would understand this treatment if I was rude, under-qualified and unprofessional. But I'm not. I'm the very opposite. Therefore, I do not appreciate being treated like I don't deserve a response or feedback when I am applying to a freaking ice cream store or movie theatre. But it goes beyond just jobs...it is everyday living. I send an email (casual or professional) and typically either don't receive a response for days or weeks...or sometimes don't even receive a response at all. This is rude. RUDE PEOPLE. Yes I understand people are busy but somehow have the time to respond to someone else...or watch TV or lounge about. I am sorry but I am just as important as the next person. I am done with this mentality. Whenever someone calls me and leaves a message...I call them back as soon as I can (which is usually never more than an hour unless I don't get reception). One day I decided to Facebook Frenchie Davis, a fairly known Broadway actress. I was not expecting to receive a message...but low and behold the next morning I had a fairly long response from the star. And we continued a conversation for some time...and even became friends on Facebook. And the funny thing is that Frenchie is on a national tour of a Broadway show currently...and she has little time to spare but still was willing to open a conversation with me. But I guess she has a similar mind set to myself. I'm not necessarily a people pleaser...but I do want people to know I care about them and extend as much as I can offer. If I am to ever become a well known actor I am going to open dialogue up to anyone who cares to listen or wants me to listen to them. It just seems to be common courtesy.

Anyhoo...I just have been so put off by looking further for a job because I have been treated poorly. Businesses have either hung up on me (for no reason) or promised to call me in for an interview and then never return my e-mails or phone calls. One job interview required an hour commute on a snowy and windy day... to the mountains...and I didn't even get it in the end. I guess I am pissed and almost feel discriminated against because my brother (who I love...but is not motivated and has no previous job experience landed a job at a nice sushi restaurant in a day). One day. I've been looking for four and a half months. Yes luck is a part of it, but I almost feel like there is something more. I don't understand how some of my friends are so lucky that they land into the jobs they do. Some don't even have to apply for them. I feel that this is unfair. Entirely. Once you have been in my position for so long you would be equally upset. In one way this is excellent practice for the acting world...but I am more used to rejection after auditions and such then I am when it comes to simple jobs at an ice cream store or book store. Come on people...it is ice cream, not rocket science. I have ample experience in communication, talking to people (acting and people skills), customer service, food preparation, etc...and to add to it...I am generally a kind soul. So what is wrong with me then? I would really like to know. I am so done being in this rut...this limbo. I want out. NOW.

Brunch.

Later today my family and I attended an Easter "brunch" at a family friend's house. Several things became apparent at this brunch. But amongst these things, perhaps the most striking, was how much I don't like where I am right now in life. Whatsoever. Yes, I am on a journey. I am on a path. A path that is oh so tedious and winding. However, whenever I have to explain to old faces where am I right now in life...I only get depressed. They ask me, "So how have you been?" And then I lie. "I've been great...really good in fact." And then they ask me..."But what are you doing"? And I respond with something along the lines of, "You know just chilling for the time being, trying to find a job. I'm really close to getting a job for the summer. I have been submitting for films and television and such and have been getting a lot of feedback and response, but I'm not in LA or NYC so nothing has come from my submissions. But I'm working on it". And then they look at me like I'm crazy. Like I'm making this up. My tone of voice is made up...sounds very proficient and like I know what I'm doing. When in reality I know that I'm in a rut. A large rut. I keep on telling myself that this is okay. Everyone takes time out of their lives to figure things out. But the truth is, there was never anything I had to figure out. I know where I need to be. And I know I need to get there.

I always hate going over to events like brunches at other people's houses. People want to fill silence with conversation. And just when you think they actually want to hear about you and your life, your stories, your feelings...they either walk away or change the subject. This "brunch" lasted roughly seven hours. Until I broke away. My family is still there as I write. I like these people, they are nice...but for some reason I was rubbed the wrong way today. I can't exactly describe how or why, but I was. People in Fort Collins are used to seeing the very pro-active Braden. The very self determined and self driven International Baccalaureate graduate. The "Thespian of the Year". And now it just seems like I'm playing childish games and waiting to hear from schools I either won't get into or can't afford. What they don't realize...is that amongst this purgatory I find myself in...I am still all of those things...in fact I could not be more hopeful for my dreams than I am right now. I know things take time. But sometimes, in order to jump start the journey, you have to make a change. Take a chance. I don't think anyone believes me when I tell them I am going to settle down in LA or NYC someday. I think they think I'm dreaming. I'm not. I am 100% sure of where I need to end up. I'm just trying to figure out the best way to get there.

It only makes me sad and frustrated when I see people that I like look at me like I'm just an infant. Incapable of doing anything truly. I don't play sports and I'm not your typical macho man, so there is my one big flaw already. I want to be an actor, yet I just left a theatre conservatory so obviously I am delusional if I think I would ever make it as a professional actor. I'm not your typical Brad Pitt figure, so I'm not meant to be in the pictures. All of these things just make me that much more driven. You have no idea. What the hell is stopping me from doing what I want to do? Nothing nor no one. And the thing is, I don't think they really know that. I will not compromise my big dreams and my goals for anything. Which is why being here is slowly killing me. I know this is time for me to re cooperate and re adjust my personal life. But come fall, if I am still here...things are going to change. In a big way. I want to be proud of where I am and what I am doing once again. I want people to come see me in my shows. To be performing again. To study. To learn. Shoot, if it was up to me a month and a half ago I would be on my way to Los Angeles right now. No school, just work and pursuing my acting. But I know this would not fly. And I do want my parents to be proud of me. But I also want them to take me seriously. Every time I tell them of a casting agent calling or emailing me they shrug and ask when I'm going to find a real job.

I don't know when, I don't know how, but I know something's coming. Maybe not this INSTANT but in the future. There are those actors like Debra Messing. Her parents encouraged her acting but said a collegiate background was necessary. And look what became of her. I just have to tell myself the same can come from me. I am capable. I am talented. And I am so eager to be apart of this business. This craft that I so love.

Another reason I was perhaps rubbed the wrong way this evening was listening to the blatant ignorance and judgment of people. Describing how a person's appearance obviously means they are a certain way. If they are chubby they are funny and pathetic at the same time. How apparently you can tell if someone is gay...which I admit is sometimes obvious, but more often not. I don't know. I guess I am a little disappointed. Conservative or even liberal, people can be harsh and ignorant. I would not want anyone to judge me the way that I see people often judge others. Sadly, it happens a lot. But being a victim of this harsh judgment I have become extremely open minded and saddened whenever I see harsh judgments being passed on others besides myself. In the end ultimately you can think whatever the fuck you want about me, but I will still be me and I will still be the only person on this planet who truly knows how I feel at any given moment. I will be the only one who has known all of my secrets, and what I do behind closed doors and who I want to become. You can pass judgment on my appearance, on my voice, on my topics of discussion or even on my hobbies or passions...but in the end, you don't know shit about what I've been through. So go ahead everybody, pass judgment on your friends. On your neighbors. On people you don't even know. But let me ask you one thing...how would you feel if I critiqued every little thing about you without really knowing you? You may have won the Noble Peace Prize but because you have greasy hair or talk higher than a bass I think your pathetic and "gay".

I guess I'm just disappointed in us. In me. In you. Yes, you are allowed to have your opinion. But why must you share it with others in a harsh matter? Why continue to orchestrate hate? This is a serious problem that really upsets me. Intolerance. You preach til the sun rises...you save people, but then you damn them to hell the next day. It just does not add up. In a world filled with negatives, there is so much positive. The same goes for beauty. This world is so beautiful. So why must we focus on bringing each other down...on the ugly facets of humanity? I dunno. Seven hour brunches usually get me thinking.

Ah Hell No YouTube.

Dear YouTube Celebrities (Fred, Bo Burnham, Julian Smith, Etc),

I am done with you. Perhaps I am a bit bitter at the fact that someone can gain instant fame from posting a five minute video on a subject that is universally over-rated...ahem...Facebook. Here's the thing. I don't care if you enjoy making movies for your sake. I don't care if you post them online. I don't even care if people like them. But here is where I draw the line. Maybe it is the actor in me that finds it incredibly unfair, but how does one like Fred or Julian Smith receive a multi-million dollar contract with a major company like Disney? For making beautiful films or works of art? No. For making shitty, over-done, over killed, shallow three minute films. Not even films. I don't get it. I semi understand the individuals like Bo Burnham who have used YouTube as an outlet for their music. Bo Burnham has since become quite popular and has even released an album on iTunes. Even more, he has a film in the works with the Appatow clan. Yes, I guess you could say that I am extremely jealous. Maybe just because I do want that...in the long run. However, in the end, I want to be known as a true performer. Someone who got to that magnificent destination without the aid of YouTube or the internet.

I can now thank YouTube for making this industry EVEN HARDER to break into. Don't get me wrong, I love me a good YouTube video. Christian the Lion, The Burt and Ernie rap and countless others...but rarely do I enjoy a video produced by an individual like Fred or Bo Burnham...and now Julian Smith. My fear is that if an agency employs one individual like Fred...how can they not take interest in the countless others who are more entertaining or talented? YouTube is now a competition for who can be the wittiest in four minutes. Who can get the most views or followers. Everything is now a popularity contest. And it is times like this when I wish we could revert to the industry circa 1920-1980. A time when actors, musicians and performers a like became known for their talents...looks were just a plus. Yes, knowing people has always helped, but now it seems that is the only way to break in.

And Julian Smith...who I have just recently been introduced to. Every video you post on YouTube has the visual quality of a film seen in the theaters. Which leads me to think that you have help. People working with you to produce such things. Money...to buy all of the expensive camera equipment. It becomes a little harder for someone to do such things when they don't have the supplies. So yes, I am jealous of you. I'm jealous of you because you are having meetings with people in LA...meeting with agencies. The exact thing that I want to accomplish. Maybe that is it. I need to harness my creative ideas and wit and produce the goddamn wittiest YouTube video the world has ever seen. Or maybe I need to shout pointless phrases through a voice synthesizer like Fred. Or write dirty songs like Bo Burnham. Or dance like Patton Oswalt's freaky child to get an agencies attention.

Yes Julian Smith, Fred, Bo Burnham, anyone of the like, I have an issue with you. Either you help a brother out or you retire. I have an issue because I know that there are hundreds upon hundreds of people who are funnier or more talented than yourselves but they don't happen to have the platform that you have. They don't happen to have the oodles and oodles of equipment that you do to make things possible. But you know what? Even though I am jealous of the success your childish videos have brought, I still know that it will feel a hell of a lot better when I achieve success the hard way. So enough. Enough of you "witty" teenage boys making videos about Facebook and our fucked up generation. I am done with you.

Sincerely,
Braden

Drive On.

I have this drive inside of me. It's like a badger in the pit of my stomach...attempting to claw its way out. I live with it everyday. 24/7. I don't think anyone around me truly knows how big my desires are. They outweigh any current care of mine. I try to maintain patience and let my drive take me to where I need to go when my time comes...But I am too afraid I will miss an opportunity. My parents continue to harass me about school. "We can't afford USC or any of these schools you are applying to. Why are you getting a degree that won't get you a job?"And I continue to tell them, and myself that I don't even need a degree for what I want to do. I'm stepping into a career based primarily on luck and talent. I could be the prettiest face on the planet but if I didn't have any connections, I would never make it in this industry I long to be a part of. I always wonder about the people who do go into this industry and call themselves, "actors". To me there are the people that entertain and the people that watch. But it seems to me that the new generation of entertainers are osbessed with finding their names on the headlines and not in the playbill for their work. I perpetually bring up Zac Efron because he is the perfect example. He has had a couple big (superficial and showy) projects but besides that, his name comes up for having a good body and a girlfriend that leaks naked pictures of herself. And then there are those individuals like Shia LaBeouf (think I spelled that right) who strictly got in this industry to make money. It is truly sad. And yes, I realize that natural talent like that of Streep's, Linney's, Winslet's, Hoffman's and others will overcast a giant shadow over the shallow Shia and Zac but it is still present unfortunately.

It is an odd thing looking into this industry I am embarking into. It is a game of chance and a game of probability. When do you go to Los Angeles? When is the right time or age to pursue your career in film and television? Am I too ugly? Am I too odd looking? Am I too normal? Am I too tall? You never know. I love and hate that part of this art. I have proven to others and myself that I can bring an immense amount of talent to any project I work on. However, it won't do squat for me if I don't look the exact way I should look for that part or even if I have brown hair and they want a blonde. Right now I am working on my confidence with my physical traits. I have been continually reminded of my talents in acting and singing but am continually reminded of my ill self image. How will I be able to get a casting agent, director, talent agent or anyone for that matter to like me if I don't quite like myself. I am the product...I am selling myself. That is why I have been running and excercising a lot. I want to bulk up a lot so that people will see me as a leading man someday. I don't want to categorize myself in any matter when it comes to acting, but I know that professionals will when my time comes and I want to be fully prepared to break out of any box they attempt to place me in.

I've been watching "Pushing Daisies" lately and have been enamored by the diversity of actors on that show (another reason I love it soooo much). Lee Pace, who plays the leading man "Ned" is my height and just as skinny and pale. It gives me hope that my "type" is getting more popular in this industry. Although, I am having troubles coming to terms with how much my youthful face does not match my body. I have the body of an NBA player and the face of a 12 year old altar boy. It doesn't match up. Which could be good for a lot of projects but I don't know! That is why I like film though...the attention of height and size is not as key as it is on the stage.

But anyway, to get off of that tangent and back to my point, there are those who can worry about degrees and end up behind a desk and there are those like myself who want so desperately to break out and tell stories. I love acting because it gives me the ability to dive into the skin of another and tell their story. A part of me thinks that it is unfortunate--that everyone else in Los Angeles wants to do the same thing and considers themself an actor. But a part of me thinks that it is exciting, and makes me want to rise to the challenge and prove myself even more. Afterall, more than half of those individuals that call themselves "actors" are only in Los Angeles to become "famous" or be chased by paparazzi. I have a friend who I love to death here in Fort Collins, however, instead of talking about the craft of acting, is always either discussing how she could never go to red carpet events or something about paparazzi or fame. It is not about those superficial elements. And it is a sad thing because the industry would contain a smaller yet more substantial pool of talent because those individuals are acting for the love of the craft and not the fame. I joke every so often about how much I would stick out on the red carpet or how much I love certain celebs. But they aren't celebrities to me...they are fellow actors who started out the same way I will be starting out.

I am hoping and praying that I get into USC so that I will make ammends with both myself and my mother and father. But now they are telling me USC is not even an option because of the prices, yet aren't willing to fill out the FAFSA by the deadline. It is a sticky situation that I find myself in because I know deep inside, that if I want to be happy and a happy actor...I need to end up in LA. And it is sticky because if I don't get into USC, I'm scared I'll pick up my things and go. Just go. And being the impatient (guilty as charged) individual that I am contuinally cringing at myself because I am simply sitting at home, calling around for jobs and applying my soul to schools. That is not what I am about. I want to prove myself artistically and as an actor. I already am confident in saying that I am a good person. I have my faults, but who doesn't? A part of me is missing, and therefore makes me unwhole. But I have a feeling I will find that with my success in acting.

I would be lying if I said my parents haven't supported me with my acting. They have in so many ways. However, it seems that now, given the current state of not being at school, and being at home, they are so obsessed with money. Me making money. Me getting a degree. A degree. Degree. A stupid little paper they hand to you...doesn't even guarantee you a job OUT of acting. The economy is getting worse and hey, I'll tell you myself that I am in dire need of cash...but I will simply not settle for anything less than my dreams. My mother had to sacrifice her dreams for the sake of her father. And I will absolutely never do that. I feel like a clown sometimes because it seems that my mother and father are laughing at me behind my back. "Do you know how many people are 'actors'?" "Look how messed up those actors are, do you want to do drugs and end up like Mickey Rourke did?" I am constantly flooded with these questions which seem absurd to myself.

Maybe I have always been the individual to find the silver lining in everything. Maybe I have my head so far up my bum that I'm oblivious to the horrible fate I am signing myself to. I don't know. All that I am aware of is this talent and passion that I possess. My parent's questions just seem silly to me because to me, I have never doubted my ability to make a name in this world and this industry. I am worthy of doing such a thing. I just have to get past the economics of this business. The brutal competition of moving to LA, finding an agent and booking my first gig. A large part of me wants to do the Kristen Wiig thing and just pack my things up and drive to LA without any notification. But then there is the fear that I will become another number under the Californian sun...a waiter. But you know what...something tells me...(and if you know me)...you'll know that I don't settle. I will prove to everyone who has ever doubted me, parents included, that I will be a successful actor. And when that moment comes, it will make all of this chaos and battle worth it.

A Letter to Humanity.

Why do we hate each other? Where does hate first find itself in a human being? Some can argue that hate is something that grows inside us as we progress in life. Some believe hate is an emotion that everyone carries from birth. Either way, hate is a disgustingly fowl emotion. There are many things that I don't like...but I don't "hate" those things. There are some people I dislike for various reasons...but I could never say I "hated" those people. Like a kiss sometimes leads to other things, so does hate. Hate leads to actions of hate...and usually serious injury or death. Murder stems from hate. Terrorist actions stem from hate. Every ill that has ever and will ever be performed stems from that horrendous four letter word...hate.

I find it incredibly sad that some people are bred in a hateful environment. You hear of white supremacist families indoctrinating their children into believing any other race but white is disgusting. That mere principal is disgusting. I feel sorry for those children who at the tender age of 2 are already witnessing burning crosses and hate crimes. We elected a black President...who I am so extremely proud of...but as we speak some hateful individual is probably thinking hateful thoughts about our leader...on the very principal that he is black. Black...a fact that he can or never would want to change about himself. It seems to me that people hate people for reasons that are unacceptable and non-negotiable. A black person is born with black skin...that is not a sin. A gay person is born gay...and that is not a sin...it is also something that doesn't make up the entirety of that individual. President Obama is black...but that is not the only thing that you think of when you hear his name...or maybe it is...not to me. Are you truly going to hate on something they were born with? Because you were born with red hair does that give me license to hate you if red hair makes me queasy? Because you are shorter than me...do I think you need to "die or burn in hell" as some people believe to stand true for gay people or Jews?

I can only understand one reason for hatred. And that is the fact that someone could be so utterly insecure with him or herself that he or she would "hate" someone else for some idiotic fact. You think we as a world and nation would learn from our past mistakes. Yet hate crimes are one of the leading reasons for deaths across our nation and other nations. I love theatre and film so much because it brings people together. Exposes people to other ways of life and other cultures. The arts continue to promote tolerance...a reason I continue to thrive in that environment. I don't care what background, race, sexual preference, religion or creed you come from...hating someone....is A SIN! You wanna talk about sins and bad habits...hating someone is a deep crime. I hear people preach about Jesus...YET they also preach how much they do not accept tolerance. To everyone or anyone that reads this, how can you consider yourself a christian or just a good person even if you have this perpetual feeling or emotion of hatred?

How does a gay person, in any way or shape or form change or effect you? Yes, everyone is entitled to their beliefs...but that gay person believes in their way of living just like someone may believe that their way of life is wrong...whatever that may be...keep it to yourself. First of all, I find it pretty foolish that you would give a rat's buttock about a gay person because how are they a threat to you? Are you really going to hate someone because they are being true to them self? Because you are a Baptist and I am a Catholic does that give me license to mock or "hate" on you? No. It doesn't. I like apples. You like oranges. How does your dislike for apples change your views on oranges...it should not. You will still like to eat oranges because that is just your preference. Just like I will still like apples. The point being...it should not matter. I have no right to take away your orange, and you have no right to take away my apple. And there must be something seriously wrong with you if you are worrying so much about my preference for apples.

I still have a foul and wretched taste in my mouth. My blood was literally boiling as I watched countless videos on YouTube...bashing gays, Jews, etc. I love Ellen DeGeneres. I love Ellen because she is funny and seems like an individual that I could be best friends with. Ellen also happens to be gay...and that somehow changes a lot of peoples views on her. Because I like Ellen, I YouTube her a lot. So this evening YouTube suggested a video of Ellen's. This video however was not funny in the least. It was Ellen's reaction to a little boy who was killed by a male classmate for asking him to be his Valentine:

After watching this, I shared the same horror and sadness that Ellen did. A beautiful and innocent life was taken away for a reason that seems so foolish and idiotic. What possibly would make it okay for another child to kill your son for being gay? Yet we continue to hear these headlines and have heard them echo for generations. Matthew Shepard is among the most famous of these individuals. Watch "The Laramie Project"...it'll leave you speechless. What was going through those two boys heads when they brutally beat Matthew and tied him to a barbed wire fence in the middle of Wyoming because he was gay? What the hell was possibly running through their minds to make them think that what they were doing was okay? This is why tolerance needs to be taught. For those of you so called "Christians"...you are preaching hate if you think that it is okay to punish a gay person for being gay. If God created everyone in his image...gay people were also created lovingly in God's image. Some crazy people think of God as a hateful God. No God or higher being who created an earth as luscious and beautiful as ours would be a hateful being.

And you know what is a true crime? Prop 8. All the Christians always bring up the fact that you will be judged by God in the end. So in that case, let God judge the same-sex couple that wants to get married. Are you God? I don't think so! Do you have the right to take away someone's rights because you are insecure or uncomfortable? I don't like extreme public displays of affection..I think I'm going to try to take away heterosexual unions. That is absurd. I wouldn't do such a thing and neither should you. Prop 8 was disgusting to begin with, because they already had their rights...and now they are taken away. Don't. Play. God. I think what was most disturbing about Prop 8 was the fact that when it was passed, I saw a photograph in a magazine with a bunch of Pro-Prop 8 individuals jumping for joy. Literally...smiles etched wide in their little, intolerant and smug faces. They honestly could have been jumping on a cadaver and that alone would not have looked as disgusting. A pro in the news world said it best...and I am wholeheartedly in agreement with him. Please watch this video.

AMEN. How can you argue against that unless you are so filled with hate or are just plain insane. I was also met with rage about this subject of hate and intolerance because I was honestly disturbed at the ridiculously cruel comments posted on any video that contained any trace of gay or lesbian material. This is a direct quote from a post by fanan454:

"f*** all gays in the whole world
gays = pigs "

Have we really gotten to comparing gay people to animals? You honestly could have just shouted "NI****" in a black baptist Church. Sure anyone can write or text a cruel statement of hatred but I would please love to meet fanan454 in person and like to hear them say those words to my face. Anyone's face for that matter. How dare you. How dare you ever stoop to that level. And that statement on YouTube was honestly the tamest one that I found. It made me want to vomit. Any gay person is just like you and I. They have a heart and they have the same body you and I have and they have a love for life...just like you may or may not have. So tell me then...why are you hating? I leave you with the following. The following is a horrendous example of a woman (a "Christian" woman at that) speaking words of hatred. Luckily the news anchor shares any proper individual's opinion and makes her argument. If you have a conscience you will be shocked by the sheer insanity and insensitivity of this Phelps woman. She, like the millions out there, is the reason for the lack of progression and love in this world. Fast forward to 3:52 to see the interview.

This simply has to end. This perpetual disturbing and frankly, horrifying out pour of hate. I dare you to go on to YouTube right now...search anything on Obama, gays, Jews...whatever...and you will find a disgustingly amount of crude, brutal and downright evil remarks. I am hurt. And I am disturbed. I will not have anyone define me or anyone else. Neither should you. I will not stand for anyone to define what normal is. Normal does not exist in this world. To believers, God did not create normal...normal is boring. And if you consider yourself to be "normal" you are boring. I kid you not when I say that I am sickened. I literally have a stomach ache over this. I know I can't do everything to change this hatred since I am merely a young man of 20 and have no social platform. But I will do everything in my power to make a difference. It needs to stop. It is that simple. I will not rest well until I know the reasons for your hatred. I will not tolerate your intolerance. I truly weep for those who are filled with so much hatred that they attack on the poor and innocent minorities. They shouldn't be a minority. Gay shouldn't be a minority. Black shouldn't be a minority. Mexican shouldn't be a minority. Jewish shouldn't be a minority...nothing, and I repeat...NOTHING should be a minority. We as human beings who were put on this earth the same, exact way, should learn to walk together with open arms and open hearts. And until that day comes...I will not feel safe...and I will have nightmares.